Happy Friday Eve, awesome readers!
Today I decided to write from the coffee shop quasi-near my house. “Quasi-near” because I spend more on gas to get here than the price for a coffee so to make up for it I don’t actually come here for the coffee. I come here for the inspiration.
You’d be surprised at what kind of people hang out at coffee shops during regular working hours. Present company included. And by “present company”, I don’t mean me. I mean the bizarr-o people surrounding me right now.
There are about 8 … No wait! 11 of us – most with our heads lost in our laptops, typing away. I’d say we all look like obsessive-compulsive typists but I try not to be judgmental.
One of us (again, not me) is wearing a suit. And not the straightjacket kind either. The “business” kind, which may or may not be worse. I think it depends on where you are at the time that you’re wearing it. And since we’re talking about a coffee shop here, I’d have to agree that the business kind is way worse. (I’m assuming that you just thought that.)
And then there’s this girl (college age I think) who’s so focused on her laptop that I’m pretty sure she’s watching porn right now. I can’t say for sure because she’s got her back against the wall and I don’t actually know what someone watching porn looks like but if I had to pick it out of a line-up I’m pretty sure I’d pass the test. Or something.
Let’s see who else … oh there’s a young mother with her baby who’s been here twice since I’ve been here. I think she comes here for the entertainment.
There are two … we’ll call them “young men” although I can’t say for sure. They sound like men and they’re talking about their crazy plans for the weekend so I guess they’re men but they look 12. This is me hoping that the way they look IS NOT a reflection of my age.
A little like Noah’s Arc, there are also two young ladies sitting very close to me. So close that I can hear their conversation. Not on purpose, of course.
Young lady #1: I don’t know. He hasn’t called. Do you think I should call him?
Young lady #2: When did you speak last?
Young lady #1: Tuesday. But it was just a text.
Young lady #2: So call him. That’s two days ago.
Young lady #1: You think? I don’t want to look desperate. Or like I’m chasing him.
Crap. They’re leaving.
I want to say CALL HIM ALREADY. Or not. I’m definitely not the Grand Puba of relationships.
There are three middle-aged men hovering silently in a corner. They just keep watching everyone else with an occasional grunt to each other. They’re either homeless or Neanderthals. I’m not sure.
Okay time for me to get back to my client work.
Thanks for listening to my rant!