Hello, awesome readers.
In light (not a pun) of all the crap that’s been going on lately, I’m happy to be writing about something non-topical. Today’s post is an opportunity to escape the news. Oh wait! I guess it IS a pun. Disregard.
In fact, today’s post is about something the news can’t cover. It’s something ridiculous. Also, a little crude. I’ll try to keep it clean.
Recently, I was at my hairdresser’s and while I was caught in the vortex of multi-tasking (sitting in the chair as Adva, my hairdresser, performed her magic on my roots, reading Start With Why by Simon Sinek, and tapping my foot to the music) I was suddenly struck by how much we take for granted.
The inspiration for this thought? A song.
You see Adva plays great music in her salon, which is one of the reasons why I love going there. (The other reason is that she’s the boss of my greys.) When a song that I hadn’t heard in forever came on, I lifted my head from my book and started singing out loud.
“I would do an-y-thing for love …”
I’ll skip the rest of the lyrics because you really don’t want to hear me sing. But when it came to the line, “but I won’t do that”, I stopped singing and asked Adva the burning question of that moment:
Won’t do what?
Adva, who was focused on not hearing my off-key vocals, had tuned out. So naturally, she had no idea what I was talking about.
The song. What won’t he do?
She stopped fiddling with my hair and tilted her head for a few seconds before shrugging.
I don’t know.
I’ve heard this song a gazillion times over the years. The lyrics have been tattooed on my brain. Yet I’ve never stopped to wonder what the song is actually about.
Clearly, neither has Adva.
Who sings this again? I asked her.
She thought a minute. We both knew but the name just wasn’t coming to us. A senior moment.
Finally, Adva responded with, “Oh I know. Big Mac!”
And then we laughed because even though that sounded right, we both knew it was wrong.
So Adva asked her colleague, “Who sings this?”
Her colleague did what we all do when in need of a quick answer: she Googled it on her cell phone.
After point 0-0-3 seconds, her colleague came back with the answer, “Meat loaf!”
Ahhhhhh, yes. Meat Loaf. Adva and I nodded to each other. Of course.
But wait! BIG MAC?
Then we cracked up because how beautifully profound? Sometimes thought-association can be both silly and poetic at the same time. I mean, when you think Meat Loaf, doesn’t everyone just automatically think Big Mac?
Okay, maybe not.
Then Adva asked her colleague the other pressing question:
What won’t he do?
Except this wasn’t a question for Google.
Her colleague’s response:
I don’t know … Eat booty?
That’s when we lost it. Adva was doubled over. I had tears running down my face. Everyone within hearing distance of our conversation had gone under the spell of hysterical laughter.
The funny thing about funny things is that they usually wind up being what everyone else is already thinking.
But surely that can’t be what Meat Loaf is singing about. Can it?
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