The Rabbit Hole

Hey there, awesome readers!

Some people call it procrastination. I call it a thirst for knowledge. And it all starts with a question.

“Who wrote the lyrics to “Me and Bobby McGee?”

Despite how busy you are, this question screams like a two-year-old having a tantrum in aisle three. Except, it’s in your brain. It wants your attention, and it wants it NOW.

Who you gonna call? Well, Google of course.

Within seconds you learn that the song was written by Kris Kristofferson. 

Hmmmm … interesting, you say out loud, yet mostly to yourself. I’ll bet Heather doesn’t know this.

Who’s Heather?

A friend from high school. Someone you haven’t seen in over eleventy thousand years because you probably have nothing in common anymore… except a shared memory that involves younger versions of yourselves sitting on the edge of your bed, belting out the lyrics with Janis Joplin singing backup vocals.

Yes, that’s right. Janis was singing back-up for us! (Don’t worry. I’m not delusional. We were terrible and I know it. Maybe I didn’t realize it back then, but I know it now.)

And so, you let your fingers do the walking and within a few clicks you’re on Facebook.

“Trivia time: who wrote Me and Bobby McGee?”

Feeling nostalgic you tag Heather, and a brief conversation takes place online that involves long-ago memories of your teenage selves.

Did I say brief? 40 minutes later you climb out of the Facebook rabbit hole with cramps in your cheek bones and a heart filled sentimental sighs.

Overcome by a need to share the social love (because you’re generous that way), the pull seizes your attention once again, only this time it leads you over to X (formerly, and perhaps forever, known as Twitter). 

Me and Bobby McGee was written by Kris Kristofferson and NOT Janis Joplin. Who knew? #trivia 

Your stream quickly fills up with unrelated yet equally interesting posts and back you go down the rabbit hole.

4:19 p.m.

You hear a sudden growl. It’s your stomach. How do you react? By heading over to Pinterest. Within 13 seconds you find a quick and easy recipe for buttered chicken. With your eyes still on the screen and your fingers glued to the keyboard, you mentally high-five yourself. Dinner solved.

But wait! Could it be? Is this a board dedicated to the fine art of organizing utensils? And weren’t you just talking about this with… Never mind. YOU MUST CHECK THIS OUT.

6:42 p.m.

You emerge once again, slightly older yet much wiser, and the first thing you see when you glance out the window is a beautiful cardinal perched in the tree outside your window.

I MUST CAPTURE THIS, you say to your smart phone as you enjoy the view through its tiny 4.7-inch screen.

Somehow this has become logical, even though your old-fashioned window – THE ONE BUILT INTO YOUR HOUSE – provides a much better view.

*Click*

Karen will LOVE this, you think as you post the picture on Instagram.

Who’s Karen?

Karen is a woman from Australia with whom you connected… you don’t remember when or how… but you just KNOW she’ll appreciate your bird picture. Somehow the fact that Australia also has birds doesn’t deter you. Again, logic 2.0 prevails.

Once more, your stomach yells at you. This time it’s joined by your personal boyfriend peeking his head into your office to ask if you too, are getting hungry. Oh yeah, that buttered chicken recipe.

But first, you must check email.

With a fervent glare and synchronized fingers, you dive back down the rabbit hole.

The dog is complaining in the background, but you know that he’ll eventually give up and lie down and the house will be quiet again. With 67 tabs open, that recipe for buttered chicken has also fallen down a rabbit hole of its own.

Perhaps we’ll make buttered chicken tomorrow, you say to yourself as you head into the kitchen where your personal boyfriend has already started making supper.

So, yes. Social media can be a rabbit hole. But now we ALL know who wrote the lyrics to “Me and Bobby McGee.”

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Mona Andrei is an award-winning humour blogger and author known for her entertaining perspective on life’s quirks. In her most recent book, SUPERWOMAN: A Funny and Reflective Look at Single Motherhood, she shares a personal journey filled with challenges and triumphs, intertwining stories and insights from single mothers around the globe.

When Mona isn’t writing, ten times out of nine, you’ll find her practicing her dance moves. As a member of a competitive hip hop team, she likes to think that she’ll stay young and cool forever. She may be delusional.