Trail Tales of Aging: A Hike, a Dumbass Decision, and the Quest for Eternal Youth (or at least, a pain-free tomorrow).

Hey there, awesome readers!

If you read this post, you know what’s on my mind these days… aging.

Yes. I get that aging is a natural phenomenon that happens to everyone.

Scratch that.

Happens to us lucky ones. The alternative to aging is, well, not so good.

You’ve heard it before, but I’ll say it here as a reminder:

You know you’re getting older when you pull a muscle while sleeping… and can’t remember how it happened.

Just me? Never mind.

So, what do us lucky ones want?

It’s not a million dollars. (Although it’s probably a top two on our wish lists.)

It’s not a new car. (Why would we want a new car when we have a million dollars?)

And it’s definitely not the ability to fly. (Although time traveling might be fun.)

Will the REAL answer to what do us lucky ones want, please stand up!

The answer is to stay healthy and age gracefully.

In the spirit of staying healthy and aging gracefully, one of the key ingredients to maintaining our health and mobility is exercise.

So with this in mind, my someone and I decided to go for a hike “recently.”

(I’ll tell you soon why the word recently is in quotation marks.)

As you can see from this picture, we had options.

What makes a dumbass a dumbass?

That’s a real question. And here’s the answer:

Choosing the 13.5 km trail when the 1.2 km option was RIGHT THERE IN FRONT OF US.

Notice the 911 reminder on that map? Well, it’s there for a reason. It practically screams: If you’re over 50 and choose the 13.5 km trail, you are a DUMBASS.

So OF COURSE, that’s the trail we chose. * Insert eyeroll *

And here’s the kicker:

We weren’t even drinking at the time.

As you can see from this picture, we were DELUSIONAL dumbasses.

They say that another key ingredient to maintaining our health is spending time in nature.

Nature just does something nice to your soul. It quiets your mind and slows your breathing. (Okay so maybe not during a 13.5 km hike at THIS age.)

Nature allows you to reflect and ponder on everything and nothing at the same time.

Admittedly, most of my reflections during our four-hour hike sounded something like this:

OMG HOW MUCH FURTHER?

WHO’S IDEA WAS THIS?

AM I DEAD YET???

But of course, I voiced none of this out loud because I didn’t want my someone to think I was feeling my age. (I was.)

And guess what. WE DID IT. Here are some pictures to prove it.

Now about that word, recently.

It translates into almost three weeks ago.

We had both taken the day off for the hike, but in hindsight, we should have taken the entire week AFTER OFF.

Everything hurt.

And I may or may not still be recovering.

(But SSSHHHH. Don’t tell my someone.)

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Mona Andrei is an award-winning humour/humor blogger, columnist, and author. In her most recent book, SUPERWOMAN: A Funny and Reflective Look at Single Motherhood, she shares her challenges and triumphs as a single mother, including stories from other single mothers. It’s a fun and insightful read. You should buy it. AND it makes a great gift for the single mom in your life. Just saying.

When Mona isn’t writing, you can probably find her dancing. As a member of a competitive hip hop team, she likes to think that she’ll stay young and cool forever. She may be delusional.